APPARENTLY My good friend Vicki over at http://glitterfrog.blogspot.com/ thinks I am TEH.AWESOME.
I made her some art. Yep and I was SOBER!
I know I have been a bad blogger, I will gladly line up for spankings. Just let me get Mr GrumpyBear out of my hair. I wanted to make smores and drink copious amounts of vino by the fire pit but he had to go and be all responsible and shit and say "You are still sick and it is humid and 45 degrees." Fucker. He can louse up a good wet dream.
But before I get to the art, let me tell you a story.
We had to go to Charleston today because well WACHOVIA sucks. WE sent 2 checks, one for my Volvo payment, the other for the note on the House O'Red. Well MR Red put the wrong voucher in with the wrong check. They could not have one dept talk to the other and straighten this out. And they wonder why I stopped the auto debit. ANYFRICKINSTOOPIDFINANCIALINSTITUTION.......we had to go to Chucktown to sort it out. While we were there lil miss perfect needed some jeans- which can only be purchased at aeropostale. Because she is petite, skinny, and has just a touch of bubblebutt, which is way cute but hard to fit-and they had a sale and I wanted to go to the mall. So we went. On the way back we stopped a Publix. I love publix. I will drive an hour to shop at Publix. When we were turning into the parking lot, this woman walked RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY CAR. In the parking lot of all places. Now I was not driving, which is why she was not run over.
But she looked at us like this:
She was rather indignant. Like we were driving on the sidewalk or something ( I only do that in my neighborhood). We parked and as we were walking by her car she muttered something. I do not speak "stoopid" so I do not know what she said. All I know is she sat there and waited til we were in the store, got out of her car, walked over to mine, smacked it's ass and left. I kid you not. SHE SPANKED MY CAR.
This shit only happens to me kiddos. I just cannot make this stuff up.
BWAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteSpanked your car...that's kinda kinky, Kat! (that thar's called alliteration!)
Kat Keeps it Kinda Kinky!
ReplyDeleteI swear I almost peeed my pants laughing, like it was the car that did it.
There is one especially funny story that involves you and Publix. Do you remember that one Thanksgiving when you thought that there wasn't the "gizzard pouch" in the turkey?? You went back twice and they gave you 2 different turkeys, only to find out that you hadn't stuck your hand far enough up the turkey to find the goodness. That was also the Thanksgiving that we discovered that they "gizzard pouch" is heat resistant.....
ReplyDeleteTHERE is a reason one does not let their little sisters comment on their blogs.
ReplyDeleteWhat?! I was just sharing a fond memory of family bonding.....
ReplyDelete